Once Upon a time there was Love
by dust-and-cobwebs
Summary: Valentine's Day... Jean muses on the happenings of late... and makes a decision...


Disclaimer: I don't own X-Men or anything related to it… or the song The Weakness in Me by Joan Armatrading…

A/N: This is my Valentine's Day Story… Happy Valentine's Day to all… ("Bleeding Hearts day")

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Once Upon a time there was Love

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"This is Charles Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters. Unfortunately no one is here to take your call, please leave your name, phone number, and a message after the tone and we will get back to you as soon as possible, thank you," "BEEP,"

"Hey Jeannie, baby, is everything all right? You haven't… um…. We haven't talked lately… and… I want to see you again sometime… yeah… give me a ring when you feel like it…oh right… it's Logan by the way… see ya," 

Jean sighed. Another phone call from Logan she didn't want to pick up. She wished he would stop calling. Did she really wish that? She didn't know anymore. Everything had gone by in a blur. Logan had left; Scott had left. Everything was so messed up. If Scott was still here, he would have held her in his arms, saying things to reassure her, but he was gone… mentally, he had broken their bond. And Logan, well… he was his own story. The man could be a novel.

Flashback

~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ 

_Logan ran into Jean while she was drinking at his favourite bar near the professor's school._

_"Hey Red, I see you're drinking," _

_"Of course, Logan, I'm a human being. I use the human remedies for pain as well…" she answered._

_"Oh, I just never really thought you were much of a drinker," he informed her. "What's wrong?"_

_"I don't know…It's just…" she sighed. "I really don't know anymore… It's…"_

_"Wait, I know a place we can go to and talk. A bar's no place for confessing," He stood up and opened the door, not before slapping down a twenty for Jean and himself._

_"C'mon Red, we're out of here," she walked out the door and they both climbed onto Scott's motorcycle. Logan took her to a park nearby, and the two walked down to the lake and sat on a bench near the water, watching as the moonlight glistened on top of the water. _

_"All right then, what's wrong?" he asked._

_"I don't think you'd understand," she answered._

_"Try me," he encouraged._

"All right then…" she took a deep breath. "Things are starting to fall apart for Scott and I… It's not the same anymore, I mean, I do know that things change, people change, but it's just that I'm scared that he's changing, and he's not letting me into his life… and I've known him for a long time… and… and… I don't think he loves me anymore…" 

_"Jean, look at me," Logan ordered. She looked at him. "I… You… um… He loves you, okay? But if you have second thoughts, remember that I'll always be there for you," This was so hard to say… God, how he wanted to touch her, but there was something about this woman that drove him insane. Here she was, right in front of him and he couldn't even touch her. Nah, she took care of that for him. Yeah, she kissed him…_

_"Jean?" he asked innocently when she pulled away for a breather._

_"Hush…" she answered, and silenced him with a kiss._

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~*~~*~~*~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

End Flashback.

Jean sighed. She sighed often these days. It had become natural to her. She wondered where Logan was, and how he was doing. She wondered if he was alone, or if he was with someone else. Wait, why did this matter to her? She didn't care if he decided to sleep with every single girl he could pick up in town. No wait, she did care. 

"You couldn't wait to get my shirt off again, could you?" she remembered Logan saying that to her once, just before she gave him an x-ray. 

Flashback

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_Yeah, Jean was drunk again, but Logan wasn't. He was sober as usual. Copious amounts of alcohol had no effect on him. Jean drunk was the perfect opportunity for Logan. Rogue heard banging on her door and opened it. Logan fell into the doorway on top of Jean._

"Whoops, sorry darlin', I got company and I guess I got carried away, won't happen again…" Logan explained as he picked up a very giddy Jean Grey, her lipstick smudged beyond compare. Rogue gave him a death stare as she quietly closed her door and locked it. Logan carried Jean to his room and locked the door. 

_"Just you and me tonight, Jeannie," he informed her with a grin,"_

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~~*~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*

End Flashback

These days Jean couldn't concentrate on anything anymore. She'd levitate a chair about two centimeters above the ground and it'd come crashing down, kind of like her life. Every time a happy memory was created, a huge depressing, heart-wrenching one would replace it. She picked at her food and her spoon went anywhere but in her mouth when she attempted to eat the mashed potatoes adorned with corn, courtesy of Jubilee and Kitty. She tried to avoid Scott at all costs, but it hardly ever worked, and he made it even harder by trying to bump into her in the hallways, causing her books to fly out of her arms. That was the perfect opportunity for Scott to talk to talk to her, and he always did. He'd ask her about the weather, how her class was, but they never talked about anything personal anymore, and Jean couldn't seem to read his mind.

Flashback

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_"Jean," Logan greeted her, and stepped out of the shadows of the curtains in the library._

_"Logan, you scared me," she replied. "Why are you here? I thought you hated reading,"_

_"I never said that, but that's not the reason I came here. I came here because-" and he kissed her. For that moment they were inside each other's minds, and were mentally connected. Logan had access to every single memory she had ever witnessed, and Jean had the same. Pieces of Annie floated by in Jean's mind, crying out to be saved while Jean watched her friend fade away, unable to help her. An image of Jean wandered across empty plains while she searched for something, but she didn't know what she was looking for. Jean could see images of men with knives, men drawing incision marks all over Logan, men cheering and drinking champagne while Logan moaned in pain. Memory upon memory upon memory, his mind was a kaleidoscope. They both opened their eyes, eyes filled with tears, mouths unable to speak. _

_"Thank you for freeing me," Logan said. He walked off to his room to go to bed. Jean sat in the library and read for a while. The clock struck midnight and Jean decided to go to sleep. She passed by Logan's room and could hear him talking, moaning, and groaning in his sleep. She walked up to his bed, leaned over, and kissed him on the forehead._

"I hope this helps," she whispered. She smiled for a second at his now peaceful sleeping form, and then she became serious again.

_"I know something's happening between us, but…it's got to stop… Things are changing now, Logan, goodbye, I loved you… for a while," she walked out of the room, knowing that she was walking out of his life. He left the next morning._

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End Flashback.

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_I'm not the sort of person who falls in and quickly out of love   
But to you, I give my affection, right from the start.   
I have a lover who loves me - how could I break such a heart?   
Yet still you get my attention. _

_-----------------_

The song was blaring on the radio while Jean tried her best to mark a pile of assignments she was supposed to hand back the students a month or two ago. Her life had been so disorganized lately, and lately she had let procrastination get the better of her. 

_  
--------------------  
Why do you come here, when you know I've got troubles enough?   
Why do you call me, when you know I can't answer the phone?   
And make me lie when I don't want to,   
And make someone else some kind of an unknowing fool?   
Make me stay when I should not?   
If you're so strong then resolve the weakness in me.   
Why do you come here, and pretend to be just passing by?   
I need to see you - I need to hold you - tightly. _

_----------------------------_

The song reminded her too much of the two men that had been in her life at one point, and had made her life more interesting. She used to be boring old Ms. Grey who did nothing but teach, organize, shelve books, and so on. Scott came into her life, and suddenly she was Scott's girl, someone Scott loved and cherished. He left her life as slowly as he had entered it, claming that they needed some time apart. Logan had come into her life and brightened that time period up, and he had left her life as quickly as he had come into it, but only because she had asked him to.__

_---------------------------  
Feeling guilty,   
And I'm worried, and I'm waking from a tormented sleep   
'Cause this old love, you know it has me bound,   
But this new love cuts so deep.   
If I choose now, I'm bound to lose out;   
One of you has to fall...   
I need you, baby. _

_-----------------------------  
  
_

Jean suddenly realized why the hallways were filled with couples, girls who were bawling their eyes out, or squealing in delight, and the boys who were blushing as they watched their crushes walk by in the hallway. It was Valentine's Day. Storm and Nightcrawler were happily out on a date somewhere in the heart of New York, and Scott was probably busy fixing his motorcycles. Once again, she wondered how Logan was spending Valentine's Day. Jean recalled what she had done last year on Valentine's Day. Scott had taken her out to a fancy French restaurant, hoping to impress her with his French. He didn't, but it was funny watching him try to speak French. It was funny how quickly time went by.

_------------------------  
Why do you come here, when you know I've got troubles enough?   
Why do you call me, when you know I can't answer the phone?   
And make me lie when I don't want to,   
And make someone else some kind of an unknowing fool?   
Make me stay when I should not?   
If you're so strong then resolve the weakness in me.   
Why do you come here, and pretend to be just passing by?   
I need to see you - I need to hold you - tightly._

_-----------------------------_

"And that was _The Weakness in Me_ by Joan Armatrading for all you broken hearted people out there on Valentine's Day. Speaking of which, Happy Valentine's day to all. Next we have a song dedication… _I love you Baby_ is sent out to Jean from… a guy named Logan… He just called in… oh, and a guy named Scott would also like to dedicate the same song to a woman named Jean… could be the same Jean… All right…" the radio announcer jabbered. The phone rang, but Jean decided not to pick it up. No one picked up the phone anymore. She let it ring until the answering machine came on.

"This is Charles Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters. Unfortunately no one is here to take your call, please leave your name, phone number, and a message after the tone and we will get back to you as soon as possible, thank you," "BEEP,"

"Jeannie… Happy Valentine's Day… um… listen, I know we aren't really together anymore… but… just for you… I'm… um…coming home… Can't wait to see you again… See ya… Oh, right, it's Logan by the way…"

Jean knew she had a choice to make. Logan or Scott? The really hot bad guy, or the sweet, cute, committed good guy? Jean walked towards the garage.

"Scott. Look, I know things haven't been going well for both of us, and I don't even deserve to be standing here before you, asking you to forgive me, and reconsider the love that we once felt for each other. I can't ask you to reach into your heart and rekindle the fire, but I came here… I guess… just to ask you if you'll love me again, and if you'll forgive me for hurting you," she said in one breath.

"Jean…" he knelt before her. "Look, I'm sorry I ever left you, I'm sorry for acting so coldly because I didn't trust you when you were around Logan. I'm… sorry," he answered. "Jean, will you marry me?" Jean stepped back and took a deep breath. This was what she had wanted all her life; her life was full of being denied and lies. If she said no, she knew she would lose him forever. She wouldn't let the same man walk out of her life again.

"Yes, Scott, I will," He took her into his arms and kissed her, and they set the date of the wedding for the week after.

At the altar the stood and said their vows. They sealed their vows with a kiss, remembering their engagement on Valentine's Day. Jean looked down at everyone that stood around her, and sighed. She had been through so much to get here, and it was worth it. She had married a man whom she knew would stand by her side no matter what. She could see Logan, and after the reception had finished, she approached him.

"Logan," she said.

"Jean, you look beautiful as usual," he replied, meaningfully. 

"Thanks, you don't look half as bad yourself, either," she retorted. He snorted.

"I'm happy that you chased after your dream, and didn't settle for something half-assed," he said, ignoring her comment.

"Haha, very funny. Logan, I'll love you as much as I can, okay?" she said.

"Yeah, Jeannie, I'll love you too. Goodbye Jean, good luck," he answered, and walked out of the room. 

"Goodbye, Logan," she whispered after his retreating form. She turned away and walked over to where Scott was standing.

"Hey," she said. He looked at her and smiled.

_The end._


End file.
